Monday Fodder Weekly Update

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March 20, 2017

Another week has gone by in a flash. It was a full week with some projects that I’ve need to get done, but nothing much was newsworthy, so I won’t bore you with the details.


I’ll only request that you pray for Cindy this week as she facilitates the Elijah house training this week from tomorrow through Saturday. It is intensive and there always seems to be lots of spiritual warfare going on, even among the participants.


Also please pray for some important meetings coming up in the next couple weeks relating to Yan Yue, our mother church, and the decisions that still need to be made about RiverGrace.


Thank you always for your prayers. They mean so much.


Make it a great week. Blessings, Dave


SERIOUS FODDER


Psalm 23:6Psalm 23:6— John W. Ritenbaugh

     "Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the LORD forever."

     This psalm began with the sheep, as it were, bragging across the fence to his neighbor. Through the course of the psalm, we went through the cycle of a year, and in this last verse, we find ourselves back again at the home ranch. The sheep is speaking about his shepherd's house, which is not up on the high tableland but down where the home ranch is.

     The psalm began with a buoyant, "The LORD is my shepherd!" and it closes with an equally buoyant, positive note. The sheep is utterly satisfied. He is saying, "Boy, I love it here! Nothing will get me out of this outfit! You see, I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever."

     We have come full circle with the sheep giving a statement of composure and contentment. In Ephesians 2:19, the house is defined as the family of God, of which Jesus is the Head.

     Do our neighbors see us as being contented, happy, at peace? Do they see the effects of our intimate relationships with God in our lives? Are we good witnesses for His way? That is the question we are to ask ourselves as the psalm ends.

     The sheep proclaims, "I will dwell in the presence of the LORD forever," concluding this poem of praise and thanksgiving of the sheep for his shepherd. The sheep had experienced life in the shepherd's care, and he wanted more of it! That thought should be a guiding beacon for us the remainder of our lives, as long as they might be—that it is our fervent desire to dwell in the presence of the Lord always.

@The Berean - http://www.theberean.org/index.cfm/fuseaction/Email.addressBook

~~~~~

A problem arises, a crisis looms, and we lock on to a solution. Immediately we think that God should do what we have decided should be done, and He should do it when we think it should be done. We go to Him in prayer, and we give God His instructions. But when things don’t work out the way we think they should, or when we think they should, we say that God didn’t answer our prayers. The truth was that God did in fact answer our prayer, but we did not see it because we were looking elsewhere or looking for something else. --Rocky Henriques

@Sent by Tommy Wilkerson

~~~~~

"Have You Tasted My Jesus?"

     At the University of Chicago Divinity School each year they have what is called "Baptist Day". It is a day when all the Baptists in the area are invited to the school because they want the Baptist dollars to keep coming  in.

     On this day each one is to bring a lunch to be eaten outdoors in a grassy picnic area. Every "Baptist Day" the school would invite one of the greatest minds to lecture in the theological education center. One year they invited Dr.Paul Tillich. Dr. Tillich spoke for two and one-half hours proving that the resurrection of Jesus was false. He quoted scholar after scholar and book after book. He concluded that since there was no such thing as the historical resurrection the religious tradition of the church was groundless, emotional mumbo-jumbo, because it was based on a relationship with a risen Jesus, who, in fact, never rose from the dead in any literal sense. He then asked if there were  any questions.

     After about 30 seconds, an old, dark skinned preacher with a head of short-cropped, woolly white hair stood up in the back of the auditorium.

     Docta Tillich, I got one question, he said as all eyes turned toward him.

     He reached into his sack lunch and pulled out an apple and began eating it. Docta Tillich ... CRUNCH, MUNCH ... My question is a simple question, CRUNCH, MUNCH ...Now, I ain't never read them books you read... CRUNCH, MUNCH...and I can't recite the Scriptures in the original Greek ... CRUNCH, MUNCH ...I don't know nothin' about Niebuhr and Heidegger... CRUNCH, MUNCH... He finished the apple. All I wanna know is: This apple I just ate, was it bitter or sweet?

     Dr. Tillich paused for a moment and answered in exemplary scholarly fashion: I cannot possibly answer that question, for I haven't tasted your apple.

     The white-haired preacher dropped the core of his apple into his crumpled paper bag, looked up at Dr. Tillich and said calmly, Neither have you tasted my Jesus.

     The 1,000 plus in attendance could not contain themselves. The auditorium erupted with applause and cheers. Dr.Tillich thanked his audience and promptly left the platform.

     Have you tasted Jesus? In Psalms 34:8 we read: Taste and see that the LORD is good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him. (author unknown)


GUFFAW FODDER


     While riding the bus, my mother noticed a young man, who was holding onto the same pole, staring at her. Eventually, he said, "Excuse me. This is my stop."

     Since she wasn't blocking his way, she was confused. "Well," she said, "go ahead."

     "And this is my pole," he said.

     My mother was completely perplexed until the young man added, "I just bought it at the hardware store to hold up my shower curtain."

     And with that, he picked up his pole and carried it off the bus.

~

     While I was preaching in a church in Mississippi, the pastor announced that their prison quartet would be singing the following evening. I wasn't aware there was a prison in the vicinity and I looked forward to hearing them.

     The next evening, I was puzzled when four members of the church approached the stage. Then the pastor introduced them.

     "This is our prison quartet," he said, "behind a few bars and always looking for the key."

@Laugh & Lift - http://www.laughandlift.com/

~~~~~

     Mrs. Harris visited a surgeon to be examined for her pain.

     The surgeon looked her over and said, "You need your gallbladder out."

     Mrs. Harris thought it over and said, "I'd like a second opinion."

     "O.K.," replied the surgeon. "You need your gallbladder out, and you’re ugly too!”

@Sent by Fred Miller

~~~~~

     I'm not saying that the customer service in my bank is bad, but when I went in the other day and asked the clerk to check my balance . . . .

     She leaned over and pushed me.

~

What do you call a bunch of chess players bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?

Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.

~

     A deputy police officer responded to a report of a barr     oom disturbance. The "disturbance" turned out to be well over six feet tall and weighed almost 300 pounds. What's more, he boasted that he could whip the deputy and Muhammad Ali too.

     Said the policeman, "I'll bet that you're also an escape artist-probably better than Houdini."

     The giant nodded. "If I had some chains," the deputy continued, "you could show us how strong you really are. But all I've got is a set of handcuffs. Why don't you see just how quickly you can break out of them?"

     Once in the cuffs, the man puffed, pulled and jerked for four minutes. "I can't get out of these," the giant growled.

     "Are you sure?" the deputy asked.

     The fellow tried again. "Nope," he replied. "I can't do it."

     "In that case," said the deputy, "you're under arrest."

~

If you are lonely, dim all lights and put on a horror movie; after a while it won't feel like you're alone anymore.

~

     The cop got out of his car and the kid, that was stopped for speeding, rolled down his window.

     "I've been waiting for you all day," the cop said.

     The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could."

     When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.

@Cybersalt Digest - Click here to subscribe: http://www.cybersalt.org/

~~~~~

    A noted psychiatrist was a guest at a gathering, and his hostess naturally broached the subject in which he was most at ease.

    "Would you mind telling me, Doctor," she asked, "how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?"

    "Nothing is easier," he replied. "You ask him a simple question which everyone should answer with no trouble. If he hesitates, that puts you on the track."

    "What sort of question?"

    "Well, you might ask him, 'Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them. Which one?' "

    The hostess thought a moment, then said with a nervous laugh, "You wouldn't happen to have another example would you? I must confess I don't know much about history."

~~~~~

Ten Ways You Know Your Internet Connection Is A Little Slow

1. Text on Web pages displays as Morse Code.

2. Graphics arrive via FedEx.

3. You believe a heavier string might improve your connection.

4. You post a message to your favorite blog and it displays a week later.

5. Your credit card expires while ordering online.

6. ESPN Web site exhibits "Heisman Trophy Winner"...for 1989.

7. You're still in the middle of downloading that popular new game, "PacMan".

8. Everyone you talk to on Skype sounds like Forrest Gump.

9. You receive e-mails with stamps on them.

10. When you click the "Send" button, a little door opens on the side of your monitor and a pigeon flies out.

@Laugh & Lift - http://www.laughandlift.com/

Monkey business... Hong Kong is home to many rhesus monkeys. They can be aggressive, especially if you take anything out of your backpack or bag you are carrying.  These pictures are scanned from old slides, but some of my favorites from before digital photography. Most live in the wild seen in certain areas where we hike.

Kowloon

Ma On Shan

Tai Wan Village

ShaTin

Fei Ngo Shan